My father told me on more than one
occasion, “When you lose your head, your butt will go with it.” It was his
way of telling me when I flooded with emotion, I made foolish decisions.
Those were my younger days; thankfully, maturity has taught me how to engage
thought more often before taking action. When people are in the process of buying or selling a house, emotions are highly engaged. We first get excited, and later justify our decision with facts or logic. Occasionally, when using only the primal brain, fear takes hold and causes us to freeze or run away; we begin to doubt our decision because we didn’t engage thought. A question which intrigues me is why people, in a high state of emotion, lose their ability to think or rationalize? And at times, completely lose all semblance of sanity. My lovely daughter-in-law Erin, who has several degrees in social work and studied the impacts of stress on the brain in graduate school, sent me an explanation of how our mind works. Here is an abbreviation: ‘We have only one brain that has developed over time, but it almost functions as two; a modern brain and a primal brain. The modern brain is responsible for problem solving, memory, language, judgment, impulse control, and reasoning. While the primal part of the brain is responsible for survival, drive, and instinct. When the primal brain is engaged, the modern part of the brain is not working. It is only when the primal brain turns off that the modern brain kicks into gear with parasympathetic nervous system responses. Stress, or a perceived threat, activates the primal brain and releases higher than normal levels of cortisol, disrupting overall brain function and causing people to overreact. It can create a fight or flight scenario, and erratic behavior.’ A high state of emotion prohibits us from making wise decisions, and might even be dangerous in some cases. This not only applies to the process of purchasing or selling a house, but in everyday life. How often do we let our emotions take control of what we say and do, without allowing our logic brain to engage? The key to making good decisions is to slow down. A friend of mine, who has spent many years in the world of psychology, suggests we should ‘feel’ first, ‘think’ second, and then ‘act.’ In that order. I suspect we can apply this wisdom most days. |
Tony Ratchford, The Tony Ratchford Group and Broker for KW Realty Sioux Falls